Three liberals were shipwrecked on an island. The first lib decided to use his liberal arts degree to fashion a boat and float home. But knowing more about decoration his boat, and less about making one, it only floated a few hundred yards before sinking and the liberal was eaten by sharks. The second liberal thought he heard someone coming to help them and ran off into the forest where he was killed an eaten by the wild boar population that called the island home. The third liberal cried realizing his friends were gone, he had no means to protect himself from the many dangers the island had in store for him, and no knowledge of how to help himself, having depended on the government his entire adult life. He wished for a gun to protect himself, and the knowledge of how to take care of himself. He sat down to think. "My entire life," he said, "I've tried to get rid of everything that would really help me right now." He then vowed to become a conservative if he ever got home, and began to look around. Struck with an idea, he walked across the bridge to the mainland and went home.