IRS Audit

Discussion in 'Open Mic' started by limbkiller, Mar 8, 2019.

  1. limbkiller

    limbkiller Pulling my hair. Supporting Addict

    Aug 18, 2011
    The IRS sends their auditor (a nasty little jerk) to audit a Synagogue.
    The auditor is doing all the checks, and then turns to the Rabbi and says, "I noticed that you buy a lot of candles."
    "Yes," answered the Rabbi.
    "Well, Rabbi, what do you do with the candle drippings?" he asked.
    "A good question," noted the Rabbi. "We actually save them up. When we have enough, we send them back to the
    candle maker and every now and then, they send us a free box of candles."
    "Oh," replied the auditor somewhat disappointed that his question actually had a practical answer. So he thought
    he'd try another question, in his obnoxious way... "Rabbi, what about all these matzo purchases? What do you do
    with the crumbs from the matzo?
    "Ah, yes," replied the Rabbi calmly, "we actually collect up the crumbs, we send them in a box back to the manufacturer
    and every now and then, they send a free box of matzo balls."
    "Oh," replied the auditor, thinking hard how to fluster the Rabbi. "Well, Rabbi," he went on, "what do you do with all the
    foreskins from the circumcisions?" "Yes, here too, we do not waste," answered the Rabbi. "What we do is save up all the
    foreskins, and when we have enough we actually send them to the IRS"
    "To the IRS?" questioned the auditor in disbelief.
    "Ah, yes," replied the Rabbi, "directly to The IRS".
    "And about once a year, they send us a little Prick like you."
    xerts1191, jfrey, Busa Dave and 11 others like this.
  2. deadguy

    deadguy Charlie Daniels Supporting Addict

    Sep 7, 2011
    Yeah, they sent the tax man, I lost my job and, you got hooked on oxycodone. They shut the lights off, they took my car and, I bought a sawed-off shotgun.
    xerts1191, Raylan Givens and Kip like this.

  3. Fatbob Frank

    Fatbob Frank Supporting Addict Supporting Addict

    Feb 5, 2014
    SOS! Love that song...
    deadguy likes this.

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